 |
| Volume 3 Issue 1 February 1998 |
Features
Interviews
Reviews |
 |
| HTINews
Article - Feb98 - [HTI Home Page] |
KEEP INFORMED OF THE LATEST NEWS Sign Up for our Newsletter [Click Message To Learn More] |
Gates' Net escapes News
Release Circa 2008 AD Satire "The earth now completely littered with software boxes, has started the vast clean up. The questions being asked are; Who was that guy??, and how did he sell us all those empty boxes??? " |
|
In an ironical turn of events, Bill Gates
supreme empoor of the world, now ruling from a virtual moon
has 
announced
that he will relocate his net worth to the newly discovered
universe. This announcement was made by the USA acting as the
publicity division of his vast empire. The reason quoted
was, "Earthlings simply do not understand the need to keep
my company competitive in the intergalactic market".
The groundwork for this move was set by the
last 10 years of world wide apathy. This event started with
the nearly complete failure of the turn of the century operating
system "Windows 00", fondly referred to as the
"Empoor's Clothes Version", the Empoor was
infuriated. He responded the very next year with a new
version "Windows 0>1", which stood for "Windows
Oh!! Great One" and included the final version of the
desktop browser "MyNet", plus the first mandatory
bundled hardware. The behavior collar and the bar code for
your butt being the most significant devices.
When leading
System Analysts and Administrators were questioned as to the
wisdom of these mandatory hardware devices, they announced that
they had been wearing them both for years and saw no
problem....no problem......no problem with these devices.
When the public objected that the new operating software would
not operate without the bundled behavior collar, the US Justice
Dept asked the empoor to stop, Please. When the court date
was set and it came to a vote, just less than half voted to
accept the concept. It was noted that this half of the Jury
had received their new free upgrade, and were wearing their new
behavior collars, but there was still hope because the remaining
were computer illiterate. The empoor was at first
challenged by the illiterate, but then in a bold move convinced
the remainder that behavior collars, with any software operating
system, were a mandatory requirement. He stated that if he
did not get his way he would not pay his taxes which would
cripple the US economy. These actions, followed by the
forced merger with the US as publicity agent for the empoor, set
the scene for today's announcement.
Elsewhere in the news today;
The earth now completely littered with software boxes, has started the vast clean up. The questions being asked are; Who was that guy??, and how did he sell us all those empty boxes???
The real internet is still alive and functioning. A group of hard core net heads reported, from a virtual gorilla base, that the original internet is alive and well and only suffering from financial woes.
Intergalactic News.
The New Universe Council charges Newcomer
Gates with anti combines activities..............
If you wish to republish this
satire please acknowledge HTI Home Toys and icons for Life .
